It’s not you

When we study emotions we learn that they are a response of how the environment affects us. It is the internal response of what is happening around us. When someone yells, we respond to that yell even if we are not the ones being yelled at.

Emotions tell us more about ourselves than of the world; they show us our connection to the world. In addition, that is how we relate with the world; that is why what we feel is subjective. No one else can feel what we feel in the same way about whatever happens in the world. If we are in a a bad mood, we will judge everything bad, but when we are well again, then we will regret what we said when we were mad.

We are responsible to feel what we feel about anything that happens; it is not another person’s fault, which is why if we feel ashamed, others aren’t responsible for that feeling but us. If someone insults us, we are responsible to feel insulted, not the others. Once we understand that, we own our emotions; we cannot make the world responsible for them.

That is why the phrase «It’s not you, it’s me» is true according to our emotions. We can make it personal or not, but in the end, it is part of our decisions in our everyday life. What we judge is what we have in our heart, not what others have. We can only talk about our experience; that is why we should not quarrerl with others about what is happening to us.

Don’t make it personal; the world is not personal. Things in life happen; accept them for what they are, instead of filling them up with yourself. Enjoy things as they come without turning them personal. You decide what makes you happy and at peace; use your liberty, make it work.